By Paul Kwo

“That's Great!” Says Tony the Tiger. I remember this commercial from my childhood promoting a cereal brand that is supposed to be well-balanced. It gives the child the right amount of fun as well as the right amount of nutrition that's needed. The same really goes for a teacher in the performing arts.

Certainly many children and teens begin their studies in the performing arts with positive attitudes, enjoying the fun that these performing arts bring to them. But over the course of a year or two, the majority of the students begin to grow tire of the constant practice and the nagging of their parents to practice. Many parents push their kid so as to not waste their hard-earned money paying for the weekly lessons. But quite often to the detriment of the student's enjoyment, these aggressive pushes often turn the students away from the art that they once enjoyed or even loved.

But the opposite is not any better. Some parents believing that the arts should be fun and that the child should simply enjoy their time spent studying the art decidedly not to ever push their child to strive for some form of excellence. Some of these child end up, with the help of incompetent teachers, studying for years with little to no advancement in their skill level. Thus wasting valuable time the child has and the money the parents spent.

So how do we find this balance between pushing a child versus maintaining the enjoyment?

1. Foster an environment friendly to practice. (Do NOT replace fun time with practice time.)

So often do I have students telling me how they simply don't have time to practice. I have heard so many excuses in my life ranging from homework to family obligations to bizarre tasks or chores they had to do, the underlying issue remain: A child does not know how to properly manage their time.

A parent's job is NOT to yell at a child to practice and to demand the child perfection in their practice. It is the teacher's job to demand the perfection and to help a child understand the importance of practice. A parent's job is to help a child manage their time so that they can actually be freed to practice. But so often I see parents instead of managing their child's schedule, they simply replace a child's existing free fun time with practice. If a boss replaced their employee's break time with more work, the employee would certainly build up resentment about the work they are to do over a long period of time. Why would we think a child would behave any differently? Do not replace a child's fun time with practice. Rather schedule out your child's time outside of school to equally balance fun time and work time including homework and practice.

2. Encourage a child to make mistakes. (Let the teacher do their job.)

Parents do not need to be the teacher. Certainly being able to answer a child's question can be helpful at home, but let a child learn on their own with the guidance of their teacher. The goal of music lessons, acting classes or dance classes is to ultimately teach a student how to do this on their own. Part of this process is for the student to make mistakes and learn from making these mistakes with a teacher. All great artists have made mistakes, just like any great inventors or scientists discover new worlds. Drilling a child 100 times on one line without helping a child understand what it is that they are doing and why they are doing it does not help a child grow as an artist. Robots can replace technicians, but robots can't replace an artist.

3. Be a role model, set a good example.

This goes back to the tried and true method of “show not tell.” Children often are told to do things, to study, to practice. One sure way to put weight behind your tiger-ing is to put yourself in the same position. Why not take on music lesson or a dance or acting class yourself? Show your child that you are doing it just as they are. Let them see how you enjoy the process and how you are learning just as they can be enjoying the learning process. Nothing gives you more credibility to your child than you doing the exact same thing the child is doing.

4. Take field trips, appreciate the arts.

Finally it is utmost important to show the child what the end goal is. Voice students generally enjoy their lessons way more than other instrumental students because they hear singers all the time on the radio and on TV. They have a desire to possibly become a great singer, or simply just be a good singer singing songs they enjoy. But other instruments may not be as easy to sell to a child as they may not have the same kind of exposure of the professional performances singers are exposed to.

So show the child the purpose of their studies. Certainly not all child will become world class performers or even pursue a career in the performing arts, but going to events can certainly stimulate a desire to grow in a child. Take a child to a concert if the child is studying music. Let them relate what they are studying to what they are watching and hearing. For an acting student, take a child to a live stage show. As for dancers, try a ballet and a street performing. Take the child to different kinds of concerts performed by people of varying levels at various types of venues. It's important for a child to see that different people are at different levels and that everyone is constantly growing.

Performing arts is fun and a lot of gratification can be derived from it. The study can be strenuous but reward is great. Help your child see the reward so that they can understand why they are going through such a long and strenuous process.